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Bog Standard

Toilet humor has always been the comfort zone of your Daily, and writers stay alert regarding memorable lavatory incidents and milestones, particularly within football. Readers were entertained to discover that Big Website columnist a well-known presenter owns a West Bromwich Albion-inspired toilet at his home. Reflect for a moment regarding the Barnsley supporter who took the rest room somewhat too seriously, and needed rescuing from the vacant Barnsley ground following dozing off in the toilet during halftime of a 2015 loss by Fleetwood. “His footwear was missing and had lost his mobile phone and his cap,” stated a Barnsley fire station spokesperson. And everyone remembers at the pinnacle of his career with Manchester City, the Italian striker visited a nearby college to use the facilities in 2012. “His luxury car was stationed outside, before entering and requesting directions to the restrooms, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” a pupil informed the Manchester Evening News. “After that he was just walking through the school as if he owned it.”

The Restroom Quitting

Tuesday represents 25 years from when Kevin Keegan quit as the England coach following a short conversation within a restroom stall with FA director David Davies in the bowels of Wembley, following that infamous 1-0 defeat by Germany in 2000 – the national team's concluding fixture at the legendary venue. As Davies recalls in his journal, his private Football Association notes, he stepped into the wet struggling national team changing area immediately after the match, seeing David Beckham weeping and Tony Adams motivated, both players begging for the official to reason with Keegan. Following Dietmar Hamann’s free-kick, Keegan had trudged down the tunnel with a thousand-yard stare, and Davies discovered him collapsed – just as he was at Anfield in 1996 – in the dressing room corner, saying quietly: “I'm done. I can't handle this.” Grabbing Keegan, Davies worked frantically to rescue the scenario.

“Where could we possibly locate for confidential discussion?” stated Davies. “The tunnel? Full of TV journalists. The dressing room? Heaving with emotional players. The bathing section? I couldn't conduct an important discussion with the team manager as squad members entered the baths. Merely one possibility emerged. The lavatory booths. A significant event in English football's extensive history occurred in the ancient loos of a stadium facing demolition. The impending destruction could almost be smelled in the air. Pulling Kevin into a stall, I closed the door after us. We remained standing, looking at each other. ‘My decision is final,’ Kevin declared. ‘I'm leaving. I'm not capable. I’m going out to the press to tell them I’m not up to it. I'm unable to energize the team. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Results

Consequently, Keegan quit, eventually revealing he viewed his stint as England manager “without spirit”. The two-time Ballon d’Or winner added: “I found it hard to fill in the time. I began working with the visually impaired team, the hearing-impaired team, supporting the female team. It's a tremendously tough role.” The English game has progressed significantly over the past twenty-five years. Whether for good or bad, those Wembley toilets and those two towers have long disappeared, although a German now works in the coaching zone Keegan formerly inhabited. The German's squad is viewed as one of the contenders for next year's international tournament: Three Lions supporters, appreciate this period. This particular anniversary from one of the Three Lions’ darkest days is a reminder that things were not always so comfortable.

Current Reports

Join Luke McLaughlin at 8pm BST for women's football cup news regarding Arsenal versus Lyon.

Daily Quotation

“We remained in an extended queue, clad merely in our briefs. We were the continent's finest referees, elite athletes, role models, mature people, mothers and fathers, resilient characters with high morals … yet nobody spoke. We scarcely made eye contact, our eyes shifted somewhat anxiously as we were summoned forward in pairs. There Collina examined us thoroughly with a chilly look. Quiet and watchful” – previous global referee Jonas Eriksson discloses the embarrassing processes officials were once put through by ex-Uefa refereeing chief Pierluigi Collina.

Soccer Mailbag

“How important is a name? There exists a Dr Seuss poem called ‘Too Many Daves’. Did Blackpool encounter Steve Overload? Steve Bruce, plus assistants Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been shown through the door marked ‘Do One’. Is this the termination of the Steve fascination? Not exactly! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie stay to take care of the first team. Full Steve ahead!” – John Myles

“Now you have loosened the purse strings and awarded some merch, I have decided to put finger to keypad and share a brief observation. Ange Postecoglou claims he started conflicts in the schoolyard with youngsters he knew would beat him up. This masochistic tendency must account for his choice to sign with Nottingham Forest. As an enduring Tottenham follower I'll remain thankful for the second-year silverware yet the only follow-up season honor I predict him achieving near the Trent River, if he remains that duration, is the second tier and that would be a significant battle {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|